Lifestyle, food and drink, and our family life and travel adventures.
If you have a child, you’ll know that there are difficult stages throughout a youngster’s life that come with a unique set of challenges. Sometimes, these difficult stages can even lead to rifts within the family, where parents don’t really know the best way to handle the situation. I have teamed up with an independent school in Haslemere to offer parents some advice on how to support their children, both emotionally and physically, even during those times when they try to push you away.
When your children start school and form new relationships with other students and their teachers, it’s likely that they won’t be as dependent on you as they were when they were toddlers. While this might feel like a punch in the gut to begin with, it’s actually really important that you give them some space and let them become independent. You should have faith in your own abilities as a parent; you have taught your child to make sensible decisions and behave respectfully. What’s more, the more grown-up you allow your child to feel, the more likely they are to act responsibly. If you smother them and keep them too close, they will start to resent you.
Of course, you should still make sure you and your child have regular one-to-one time so that they can open up to you about any problems they’ve been having. This could be a chat in the car on the way to football practise, or perhaps you could suggest that the two of you take the dog for a walk together. Either way, it’s important to make time for your child so that they know you care and you’re there should they need you.
Remember that respect is a two-way street and your child will not feel comfortable around you if you are always yelling at them. Instead, speak to your child in a way that you’d be happy for them to speak to you. Lead by example and be the bigger person; after all, you are the bigger person. Bear in mind that as your child grows up, they will start to develop boundaries that you need to acknowledge. They will probably start to keep secrets from you and may even shut themselves in their bedroom for hours on end. Try not to take it personally and instead realise that it’s a normal part of growing up.
This is a collaborative post.
Welcome to Birds and Lilies! I'm Lou: mother, blogger and freelance writer. This is my lifestyle blog, where I talk about motherhood, infertility and IVF, beauty, my love for food and wine, as well as my thoughts about stuff, and our real-life and travel adventures.
Contact: [email protected]
