Lockdown Update: Trying (& Failing) to Do it All

Hiya my lovelies, how are you?

I’m about to have a gin and tonic at 5pm and the only reason I’ve held off this long is because I couldn’t be arsed to move.

I am SO tired today (and every day since about last February). Covid makes you really tired, doesn’t it? I don’t have Covid, to be clear. I mean all of this makes you so tired, doesn’t it? All of the lockdown and homeschooling and being together all of the time with nowhere to go and the repetitiveness of all this. And I’m feeling very crap with a sore throat, an achy body and I’m getting lots of migraines too and I don’t even have the energy to shower today. So I’m feeling sorry for myself, OK?

I want to sleep all of the time until it is what should be my bedtime and then I want to stay up and have a party for one all night, especially if I have a good book on the go and a nice (any) glass of wine.

Is anyone else drinking too much right now? I know I am and I’ve tried to stop on some days, but that was rubbish so I just carried on instead. Times are hard, right?? I need wine, G&T’s, vodka, lime and sodas when I’m trying to be good (fewer carbs and calories). I feel on edge most of the time and it helps me to relax in the evenings and enjoy yet another evening with my wonderful but very talkative nine-year-old.

Speaking of which, how on earth is she 9 already!? It seems absolutely crazy that I’ve now been a mum for ten years, but then again I can’t really remember what life was like before she was here. I cannot believe she is ten next year though – it’s so grown up! She’s pretty difficult at the moment, but obviously everything’s hard for her right now, too, and we still have lots of fun together and are really close and I love it. I hope we stay that way once she’s an awful teenager.

I’m struggling quite a bit at the moment. The most important things for us/me to get done each day are Ava’s schoolwork and my work, but I HATE leaving the house stuff that needs doing. It stresses me out so much having mess everywhere and needing to hoover and clean the bathroom but not having time to do it. I could do it in the evenings sometimes and I do a bit, but I’m so knackered by then regardless of what we’ve done all day. A lot of it gets done at the weekends but I also don’t want to spend all weekend cleaning and tidying either. I know I can’t do it all at the moment but I HATE IT SO MUCH!!!!

I hope you’re all doing OK? It’s all feeling pretty monotonous now isn’t it, and the new strain has made it scarier again. Hopefully, we’ll keep going with the vaccines and the weather will start to get nicer and the evenings lighter and longer and everything will keep getting better for us all. Fingers tightly crossed.

Take care.

Lots of love, Lou xxx